"Things that matter most must never be at the mercy of things that matter least." ~Goethe~

12 February 2015

In loving memory...


August 1921 - February 2015


     Our family has been through a rough time the past two weeks.  It all started with a phone call that my father-in-law was back in the hospital.  Something just started nagging me that this was it and he didn't have much time left.  So once my husband got home from work we started preparing everything to get him back to his Dad as soon as possible.  There was no time to delay.  It had to be now.  Dad was so worried that he would never see his son again.  So with that my husband made it back to his Dad and had a few wonderful days with him before things took a drastic turn.  There were many calls from here and there with updates on Dad.  Phone calls that included everyone telling Dad how much we loved him and how much we all missed not being there with him.  Every time the phone rang here we all thought this might be the call, with our hearts in our throats.  Then there was the call, so very late at night, with the news we were all dreading.  Why else would there be a call this late.  My husband was calling to tell us all that his Dad had passed minutes before and that he was done suffering.  It was so very tough to try to keep it together for my husband.  Memories of a similar call about my very own Dad flooded my head.  After the phone was hung up, tears fell for the longest time and there was just no way going back to sleep was an option.

     To say that I'm proud of my husband for his strength and courage he has had the past two weeks is an understatement.  From the time he walked through his parents front door, he never left his Dad's side.  There were hugs, tears, good talks, hands being held and many more memorable moments that the two of them shared together.  It was bitter sweet, but all good none the less.  Moments that can never be taken from either of them.  A son taking care of his Dad till the very end and a Dad knowing that he was loved and cared for no matter what.  And the wish they both had of seeing each other one last time was accomplished.  That alone is beyond priceless.


~ * ~


     My father-in-law was truly a one of a kind.  There will be no other like him ever on this Earth.  He was a humble man.  Never thinking he was better than anyone else.  He had a work ethic like no other I have ever seen, besides in my husband and my own Dad.  He always had a smile on his face no matter what situation was staring him in the face.  

      He served in the US Navy during WWII in the Pacific and went through some horrific times that he never boasted about.  He always had the attitude that it was just something that had to be done for our country and by God you just did it.  He never talked about these times.  It was still painful even to the end.  He was a true hero with 4 bronze stars awarded to him and many more accommodations for all he did in the US Navy.  Honors that everyone in the family would never let him forget about how proud we were of him for what he did to be given such honors.  He would just wave his hand and nod his head at us.  He was a patriot through and through.  A man from a great generation of this country that will never be matched.

     He was a man that always had such a wonderful humor and quick wit that just couldn't be matched by anyone, even to the end.  The day my husband arrived home, everyone went to breakfast with Dad. The restaurant was filled with family and friends.  Someone commented on how funny it was that with eight children (two passed when they were babies), Mom and Dad had picked the right son to name Jr.(my husband) even though he was the 6th child born.  Someone else commented about how the two of them looked like twins years apart and then asked my husband how old he was and he answered back.  Immediately Dad replied "I look pretty good at that age."  He was sharp.  He could make you laugh without trying.

     He loved his family dearly.  He always thought he didn't do enough for them.  Which was far from the truth.  He loved his wife like no other could.  He was married to her for 66 1/2 years at the time of his passing.  And he could not stand being away from her for one minute.  It was complete torture for him when he had to spend the night at the hospital away from her.  Such love there was between the two of them.

     He was proud of all his boys.  No matter that they probably drove him nuts during their younger years.  I for one do not know how he made it through all their crazy shenanigans that I have been told about while they still lived at home.  Tough man indeed.  He only had praise and warm words for them when speaking to someone about them.

     He was so proud of all his grandchildren and great grandchildren.  I will never forget each time he met our children for the first time.  Holding them in his strong arms and walking around with them, talking and showing them things with such pride.  The same thing he did with all of his grandchildren.  Beyond beautiful.

     It has taken me all evening to put these words down.  So many memories of this wonderful man come back into my head of the past 28 years that I have been lucky enough to know him.  Memories that make me smile.  Memories that are making me cry at the same time because my heart breaks because he is not physically with us any longer.  I only hope that he knew how loved and appreciated he was by everyone.  Family and friends.  There will always be a special place in my heart for my father-in-law, just as with my own Dad.  And a never ending gratitude for sharing his son with me so that I can be with a man as wonderful as he was.


Thank you for everything Dad.

Love,
Kar




     

7 comments:

  1. You all have my deepest sympathy in the passing of Glenn dad. With the recent passing of my own father your words brought back many memories of his last days and that dreaded phone call in the late night. No call in the night is ever good. I am so glad that Glenn was able to spend time with his dad in his last days. That is something that he will have forever. Please express to Glenn our sympathy and a BIG hug to you both.

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  2. I'm so sorry for your families' loss Kar. Thinking of you. Heather

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  3. Oh Kar,
    My heart goes out to you all. What a wonderful blessing to have a FIL like him, and such a blessing for him and your hubby that they could spend his last days together. May God bathe each one of your family members in His peace and love, and give you all strength through this difficult time.

    Hugs and Love,
    Becky

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  4. Oh Kar...I am feeling for your husband, his family, for you and your children. It is such a difficult thing to deal with the passing of a parent. I was SO glad to hear that your husband was with his Dad when he passed, it truly is a privilege to be there. Your words reminded me so much of my own experience when my Dad passed away nearly two years ago. I was with him holding his had when he took his last breath. It is something I will never forget and as hard and sad as it was, I wouldn't change it for the world. These next days and months will be hard for you and your families, I will be thinking of you all. Sending my love and big hugs.
    Anne xxxx

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  5. What a wonderful man. My heart goes out to your entire family. You know I'm here for you. xoxo

    p.s. I also enjoyed reading about your Dad. And although I always knew he was special to you (of course), I now am able to put a face with the memories. <3

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  6. What a wonderful man.
    My thoughts are with you all during this time.

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  7. What a beautiful and loving tribute to the men in your life. I'm sorry Kar, prayers to you and your family.

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